Now i can confidently say that, I'm Immune to Sadness or Love!!!

Posted by redthil On 2/14/2009 01:38:00 AM

Rewinding my life for about 3 years. That's the time when, When someone asked me "Do you love Me?". Without any research, without any background verification, without analyzing the likes nd dislikes of each other, without comparing where we're aligned and where we're not, without any hesitation, just kept her in mind, as a part of my life, for a second and it was that moment, The Moment, which i felt, like million butterflies flapping its wings, like million stars sparkling, like million flowers blossoming, like million rain-drops falling in dry land, in my heart. You know what, this what i feel and call it as "Love". And My answer, immediately was, "YES". It was just four days from that moment, during which we discussed lot of things because it wont be smooth ride for both of us to get thru this and I completely TRUSTed Her to the core - believe me when i say its so hard to get someone TRUSTing Her like that, when i told my dearest friend, honestly, it was him who found the difference in me and asked, He was so stubborn and doesn't want me to proceed with this thing. But even then, i TRUSTed Her so much and never wanted to step myself down or never regretted, Until i actually came to know that, my TRUST is not worth at all, its so so so stupid to TRUST such person. It doesn't matter whether its four days or forty years. Its just that TRUST which matters always. Its hard to put in words how that feels like. Damn!!!! And its Life you know. It has to go on. Whatever.

And it does not end with that. Even when you fall into deep water,like a well, it pushes you up for three times towards the surface, it gives you three chances for you to survive. I just thought my first chance is already over. And i'm in surface now. But there is this downward force which tries to pull you down. Though first time, its by accident, second time its completely under your control only. And i was ready to take the risk of the second time, but this time it was me who felt that i love HER (not the same person). But i never told HER, for that matter, not to anyone in this universe. As usual was waiting waiting waiting for the right moment. But only later to find that i waited too much and realized how stupid i'm to let all my chances down, only when i came to know that , SHE found HER good soul-mate. SHE never knew and will never know who HER BEST soul-mate is or could have been. I like HER so much, even when SHE told me that, i couldn't say anything, anything. How stupid i'm. there is no point in feeling so much for that now. And my second chance, gone for toss due to my stupidity. I still dont know, whether SHE's fortunate or I'm fortunate for this. Caz, now i'm back to the surface so strongly that no force, how much strength it may have, can pull me down. And its Life you know. It has to go on. Whatever.

By the way, wondering why suddenly confessing it here!!!!! You remember these words "somehow-sometimes-somethings-somewhere". yes, that feeling sad for nothing. the same one. finally found this is "The Thing". It was just lying in mind somewhere, without being told to anyone. This bug was invisibly creeping in my mind all these times. Finally, i found it, and throwing it down here and dumping nd locking it completely so that it never comes back to my mind again.

So, Whats the takeaway for you from this post?? First, if you think you Love someone, never wait for your turn or never wait for chance or never have second-thoughts to tell the other person that you love him/her so much. Even if you know that it'll surely get rejected, never hold back, just express what you feel,. Express yourself. Secondly, on the other side, if anyone proposes to you, just keep them in your mind for a second, feel how you feel, and if you feel like what i mentioned, then call it as Love. And i agree its risky. i agree something like what happened to me can happen. But, never call something as Love, if you do whatever i have told after "without" in the first para. Its something like arranged Marriage only, where you take time, get info of the other person, analyze everything, blah blah blah... Never ever call that as Love. Its so stupid to call that as Love. Love is there in Heart, which does not want anything like this. It has no connection with Brain, which does the analysis part. Love is purely about how you feel from Heart. Its purely emotional. Its always the Feeling which decides whether you're in Love with a person or not. Only after that, you struggle (in most of the cases, but the trend is changing) to make it practical. When you give importance to both practical and emotional at the same level, you should never ever claim you're in Love. And i strongly think that "True Love" has nothing to do with the number/times. At the same time, you cant say that you have "True Love" with many people, caz, as i said, its always like falling into the deep water.

And this post is not in intent of hurting anyone, or not written with keeping anyone in mind. though tagged as personal, being published here in my blog, you have every right to write comment. But i have only one caution or note or warning or DANGER, to you. Whoever it may be, Never ever ask me to whom those first two para refers to, until and unless you dare to marry me. Lastly, Happy Valentines Day!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"And now i can confidently say that, I'm Immune to Sadness or Love"

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3 comments

  1. redthil Said,

    Oh Nooooooo!!! i came to know that there are lot of conspiracy predictions in air. Please, never come to conclusion of anything on your own. i'm damn sure that whatever you think are wrong.

    And i'm absolutely awesome now. no problem at all. as i said, i'm immune to sadness. i think you got it. hope you're getting it.

    Posted on Monday, February 16, 2009 1:47:00 PM

     
  2. CoNfUsEd Said,

    :)

    Again ... welcome to the gang ;)

    Posted on Tuesday, March 10, 2009 3:57:00 PM

     
  3. redthil Said,

    Lets Rock Macha!!!!!!!!!

    Posted on Tuesday, March 10, 2009 8:38:00 PM

     
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